Yeah. So I didn't do the Confirmation stuff. Does that mean I'm not going to get confirmed?

I just want to apologize to pretty much everyone for being a very sucky friend both recently and lately (depending on who you are). I owe a HUGE apology to Kat. I really really really really feel horrible, and I doubt I'll ever forgive myself. Even if you say it's okay, I'm going to feel horrible. If I had just turned on my cell phone, I would have remembered. If I had simply picked up my purse, I could have remembered! Everything was so quick and so slow in the morning. I slowly got out of bed to say goodbye to Julie and was going to start working on the Confirmation stuff and then get ready for Picket Fence. Then I realized that I wasn't going to see Julie for a number of months and wanted to help her move in with everyone else. I ended up crying after I'd said a prayer for them to have a safe trip because it hit me: Julie was going to be gone. My thought process switched to how I really wanted to go with them, but I decided it was too late. They hadn't left yet, but - here's where I started to forget - I had to do my Confirmation work. My choices ended up being: either I stay home and do the work or I go with my older sister and former roommate of years. My mom came back in to get something and saw me crying because I had to open the door for her (it was locked). She told me to get dressed and that I was going with them. By that time, I had completely forgotten about everything else. Fortunately, I remembered that I had homework, so I grabbed my backpack. When I got in the car, I got everything situated and even forgot about the Confirmation work that I had to do. All I could think about was going up to College Station to help Julie and say farewell to my sister... Man, it's hitting me again. I have my own room for the first time in ten years, and I don't know if this is exactly a good feeling. Man... I'm SO SO SO sorry, Kat. I really am. Trevor and I decided (I called his cell phone after you left because yours was off or something) that we will all go to dinner either Thursday or Friday (if you can). We can go/do whatever you want. Oh, and I'm going to get that birthday present I owe you. And hopefully an extra going-away present. I also need to get Trevor a birthday present (he never had a party) and Sarah a birthday present. I also need to get Nathan a birthday present and Amy a "get-better" present. I'm going to need to get Bob Dole a birthday present in less than a month. I hope I'm not forgetting anyone. Ah crud; I never called my cousin to wish her a Happy Birthday. *slaps forehead* CRUD! I never thanked my grandfather for my card!! AHHHHHHH! I've been so sucky to all of you. I've used that s-word twice in this post because I really do feel so badly about my behavior/attitude/mood swings/etc. I would cry right now, but I'm far too tired and out of it. Dangit.

Oh, and please don't anyone make comments about how I haven't been bad or anything because those would be lies. I deserve to feel guilty. I've slacked off on everything and tried to cut myself out of the paper of reality. I have some pretty good stickers, but not enough tape (ironic... two words: duct tape). Oh, my Bob: I just typed "stickers" instead of "scissors". Wow. I'm going to go to bed now. Peace out.